They say that resolutions are supposed to work, but that's not happening...
Haha, I haven't posted in a while... Haha...
Today, I want to post about high school. NO, DON'T YOU EYE-ROLL AT ME. I know, you've heard it all, you wanna skip it, and you wanna scream, "GEEZ, ADELE! BE MORE INTERESTING AND ORIGINAL. AND POST MORE!"
(Yeah, I am sorry.)
High school. Four years of your life, and along with college, transition you from your childhood to adulthood. Well, for most. Some people have never-ending childhoods. I mean, look at Castle:
When you start high school, you're an annoying little freshman that the upperclassmen all moan and groan about. You don't want anyone to know what grade you're in, but you can't help feeling a bit excited cos, you know, HIGH SCHOOL! Your teachers have been telling you that you actually need to get your act together because high school is "so much harder." And you'd go, "Pffft, yeah right," as you cruise by, winging things and procrastinating, and still get A's. Then first year in high school, you think, "Hey, this isn't THAT bad. What have my teachers been warning me against? This is nothing!" Still winging things, procrastinating horribly, and getting A's.
Then sophomore year comes around. You feel like high school's gonna be a breeze cos freshman year was SO EASY. The year starts off okay. The teachers are okay. The assignments are easy. That quiz, psh, study? Why would you study? Homework takes three seconds. Then, at some point, and you don't remember when, assignments and tests and quizzes are flooding in, and you don't understand what's happening in half your classes. Some teachers have somehow grown devil horns, and you can't help but feel that some teachers are working together to plot your demise. Homework takes hours upon hours to complete, and even longer if you get distracted/it's late at night/you have extracurriculars that suck away your time/you don't understand what's happening in the homework/you get really frustrated over a problem in, say, math homework, and you just want to chuck your book across the room, but you can't, so you keep working on whatever you're working on, to the point when you want to scream and run around the house like a crazy person/other circumstances... The level of difficulty of schoolwork increases. The level of stress increases. You feel like "the world is conspiring against you," as my friend, Ana from Butterflies of the Imagination has stated multiple times. You forget assignments and realize late at night that you had to complete them, stay up super late in a failing attempt to finish them, give up to go to bed or fall asleep on your work, try waking up early the next morning to complete the assignment(s), somehow finish, rush to get everything together, nearly miss the bus, but make it because you sprinted really fast. Then, at school, you realize you forgot some other work at home and you just wanna go, "GAHHHH, I QUIT!" But you don't. And you superman through the day.
I feel like in high school, at some point or other, you either sacrifice your happiness and get decent grades, or you sacrifice your grades to be happy. Or you sacrifice your happiness to try to get good grades, but fail at doing so, making you more miserable. Or you sacrifice your grades to be happy, then you realize that your grades are horrendous, and you lose your happiness too. Or you're just someone who tries but doesn't care too much about whether that's an A or an F, because you "put in your best effort." Haha, that doesn't really work in my house, but whatever floats your boat!
Aside from educational pressures, you also have social stress. Maybe you accidentally said something that upset your friend, and you just can't help thinking about that all day. Or that cute guy/girl (whoever you're into!) acknowledged you, and you realize how amazing and horrible crushes are all at the same time. Or you just don't have friends, like me. MISANTHROPES UNITE! Haha. Isn't that an ironic phrase?
You see the magazines, and you feel like they're saying, "Thinner is better! Go and work out! Hide your ugly face! Be dramatic!" Then, there's all of the problems of today that keep showing up, like the feminist movement and the #BlackLivesMatter movement and the slut shaming movement, and you start thinking about all of the other issues of the world, but that's for a whole other post. You can't help but get swept up into that madness. Then there's the issue of who's gonna be the next president, but obviously, that's not a worry because, I mean, I'M obviously gonna win (jk, but I would make a pretty cool president, I'd like to think).
You want to do better, but you're too lazy to. Or you don't have the time to. Or a mix of both. Your mental health may plummet. You're not accustomed to the stress and difficulties that have presented themselves.
You sometimes stop, take a moment, and ask yourself, "When did it get to this? When did I start struggling so much? How did I let this happen?"
You can never find that moment when things went downhill. You just know that it did.
In high school, with all of this madness, the small pockets of happiness shine out. You remember those moments that made you laugh so hard that your face turned red, and you got cramps. You remember those wonderful people that made you laugh, and you cherish them. You remember those weird quotes that your friends have made, and those turn into internal jokes (but it's really awkward when you refer to it and your friend doesn't remember, so you have to explain it to them in a slow, "you're-a-silly-child" tone until they get that "aha!" moment. It's even more awkward if they don't get it).
Your achievements make you proud, even if you're the only to truly appreciate them. You love your moments with your friends, but you learn to enjoy those moments when you're alone as well.
If there are any people heading toward high school, I hope I have scared you. It's good, even healthy to have a little bit of fear. But I hope that doesn't stop you from doing the best you can, and then some, because you know you are completely able of achieving more.
So what are you doing now? Stop reading this thing if you haven't already. Yes, I'm talking to you, person-who-eye-rolled-and-then-kept-reading-because-they-were-ahem-bored.
Now go and do something great today.